Can We Do a Better Job Raising Our Kids?

As you know I read a lot about teenagers, from how to teach them to become leaders to things about their social-emotional well-being and psychology.  I also read a lot about parenting as I work with parents of teens on a daily basis and I am also still a parent of a teenager.  Everyone has an opinion on parenting, and there is one indisputable truth: previous generations have a lot of advice for each succeeding generation in terms of what they need to do better!  It is kind of like how we like to say this generation of teens are worse than the one before, and they were worse than the one before that!  

I have said in a variety of settings that I do not believe that kids today are a whole lot different than the kids I had when I started teaching in 1985, or for that matter, when I started high school in 1977!  What has changed is how parents parent.  I ran across a blog written by Victoria Prooday, an occupational therapist, called Your OT.  She addresses the environmental factors that young people face in many families and the impact that they are having on kids.  There is also some good advice and things that parents can do to raise stronger, more independent, and capable kids.  Take a few minutes to read this one!

The Silent Tragedy Affecting Today’s Children

https://yourot.com/parenting-club/2017/5/24/what-are-we-doing-to-our-children

It’s More Than Racism

During the week of July 4, 2016 Alton Sterling in Baton Rouge, Louisiana and Philando Castile in St. Paul, Minnesota were shot and killed by law enforcement officers.  Unfortunately these two shootings just seemed to be two more in a long line of violent deaths of young black men at the hands of law enforcement.  While there was a lot of attention for a week or two on the news, like has happened so many times before, the nation moved on to something else.  

When the history books are written about this time in our nation’s history, it will be interesting to see if the names Trayvon Martin, Eric Garner, Michael Brown, Tamir Rice, and Freddie Gray are mentioned, and whether the use of excessive force on behalf of law enforcement is even considered an issue.  It will also be interesting to see if in those same history books whether or not the "2000-teens" will be noted for a period of racial intolerance and strife, or maybe a continuation of a civil rights movement that has been going on in our country since the 1950’s.  Or maybe we are on the front end of some other type of a movement or cultural shift in America.

From a personal perspective I have sat in the comfort of my living room in a house in a small town in a rural part of the Midwest, and I have watched these news reports, including those that reported on these shootings and the aftermath, and thought, “How is this still happening in 21st-century America?”  We recently had an African-American serve as President, and we have had women serve at high levels of government, as well as CEOs of major corporations and leaders in a number of other fields.  No, I was not under the illusion that we lived in a nation of equality, but I thought we were further down the road than this.  The level of violence we have in our country is incredible, and it seems that since the 2016 election people have become more bold, advocating taking the law into one’s own hands.  

Along these lines I have found some of the response to the Black Lives Matter movement interesting, as well as disheartening.  What I find most interesting are I guess what you would call counter-movements, specifically those who bang the drum that All Lives Matter, as well as those who show up with signs and placards that Police Lives Matter.  Maybe I am too simplistic, but duh!  Of course all lives matter!  Of course the lives of police men and women matter!  No one said that they don’t believe that!  When a minority group of people are oppressed, like African-Americans have been since they were brought to this nation, they can only hope to get action by drawing attention to their plight.  Their efforts to have change or discourse would not have much impact if they didn’t focus on their group.  Would it make a difference if their movement took on the moniker Black Lives Matter Too?

I am frustrated that people blame the media and say that they are sensationalizing it, and that a liberal bias places the focus on minority issues and do not tell the whole story.  Well, according to mappingpoliceviolence.com, police killed more than 100 unarmed black people in 2015.  That is 5 times the rate of unarmed white people killed by law enforcement.  That is not fake news, and that is not the result of biased, liberal journalism.  It is a fact, and yet there has seemed to be little concern about doing anything to bring about positive change.  The gun advocates immediately take to the airwaves and within hours after a shooting start defending the right to own guns and do not seem at all bothered by the fact that once again a human being has been killed.

As I write this we have just had three unusually hot days in a row in early June.  I am old enough to remember some of those hot summers when cities in this country burned due to racial strife.  It happened in the 60’s and again in the 90’s.  In each case there was discontent to the extent that a spark set off rioting, looting, arson, and death.  Will this be another one of those hot summers where something will happen because of the racial intolerance that still exists in our country?  At one point I thought we might be past having to worry about that, but right now I would not be surprised if it happened again.  

As a young boy I was fortunate to live in a community with a great deal of diversity for a couple of years, and then moved to one of the larger cities in Iowa where I played with kids from different ethnic backgrounds and skin colors.  There is no doubt that I have some racial bias as I think it is nearly impossible in our culture not to.  But I thank my mother in particular for teaching me respect for others and tolerance for differences.  That said I would have thought that by now our country would share that value, but we’re not there yet.

Should We Start School Later In The Day?

Some of you have perhaps read that there is evidence that says it would be better for student learning if we started school later in the morning.  It has been a topic discussed for at least 15 years, but not until recently has there been a strong piece of research that supports this notion, or a call for change from a reputable institution.  That has changed.  The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has published a report based on data collected from the 2011-2012 school year looking at over 39,700 secondary level school students in the United States.  The results may not surprise people, though one questions whether they will have any impact.

So what did the CDC have to say?  First off, they reported that the average school start time in the United States was 8:03 a.m.  That is not much different than the start time we have at NFVHS, which is 8:15 a.m.  That said, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), high school age students need up to 9.5 hours of sleep per day.  Working backward, the would require that they go to bed somewhere around 9:30 or 10-o’clock at night.  But we know they don’t do that, and we should not be surprised because the AAP also notes that because of their natural sleep rhythms, it is very difficult for them to fall asleep before 11 p.m.  So with the fact they generally cannot go to sleep until 11:00 p.m. and have to start school around 8:00, we have a generation of teenagers that are sleep deprived, and when one considers that many of our students are up and participating in  our strength and conditioning program at 6:00 in the morning, or rehearsing for drill team, jazz band, chamber choir, or any other number of before school activities, one has to question whether this is the best schedule to use.  

Would our students be more productive and learn at a higher level if we moved our start time later in the morning?  If research says that they would, why don’t we?  Let’s got back to the chalkboard and look at the math.  With the data above, and working backwards, it would appear that the optimal time to start the school day for high school students would be 9:30 to 10:00 a.m.  I based that on 9.5 hours of sleep and students getting to sleep at 11:00 p.m.  And, I am giving them an hour to take care of their morning routine and get to school.  Then it comes down to whether we have before school activities, something that I believe we would have to do based on the wide range of opportunities that our students have.  If we started those no earlier than 8:30, then theoretically students would get around 8 to 8.5 hours of sleep, which is significantly more than the majority get now.  Otherwise, we would look at a 10:30 a.m. start and I find it hard to believe there would be any support for this.

Before we dig into the “whys” there is a little more information to consider.  Within the past 18 months the Des Moines Public Schools looked at moving their start times later, with the district’s high schools starting at 8:30 a.m.  At the writing of this article, their five high schools start their day at 7:40 and end at 2:35 in the afternoon.  That is significantly earlier than what we are accustomed to at NFVHS.  However, may metropolitan schools start earlier than 8:00 in the morning, some as early as 7:15, which contributes to the average start time in our country being 8:03 a.m.  We would also need to decide how long we want our school day to go, and thus how late we would finish up.  Would it be so bad to have school end at 4:30 or 5:00?  Isn’t 9-to-5 more in line with the average work day?  Maybe we just need a big shift.  Few kids go home after school and have chores to do outside that require daylight, so that wouldn’t be much of an issue.

There are five issues that I see that would need to be addressed.

• The first is whether a change like this would apply to elementary students too, and if not, the logistics and costs associated with transportation.  The research shows that it is the adolescent that is sleep deprived, not the younger students.  
• At the high school, a later end of the day would see significant loss of instruction time when students have to leave early for extracurricular activities.  Now, when kids have to leave for school events before the end of the day they usually miss less than thirty minutes of class.  Extending the day will be more lost class time as it is doubtful that those start times for activities will change much, or can change much.  
• The third issue applies to elementary kids, but some high school kids too.  Some parents already leave early in the morning, and drop their kids off well before the start of school.  For elementary kids that would force the expense of child care before school.  Where this becomes a problem for high school kids is that they  may be the ones that provide the child care.  They will not be getting that valuable sleep their bodies need. 
• Some people will argue that this would result in less family time at home in the evening, though I question how much there is now with family members having their collective noses stuck in their electronic device.  I am all for quality family time, and for those households where it exists, this would be a negative.  
• Finally, old people have routines and habits, and there is resistance from teachers and other adults to a change like this.  They come from the old school belief that a person needs to be out of bed and going early in the morning.  We see all kinds of examples of that at schools today, and thus, that would be a significant change.

Honestly, there has been very little conversation of moving the start time back in our district.  Nothing more than off-the-cuff comments whenever something new is said about it in the media.  Our conversations over the years has had more to do with making busing work than anything else.  We have had conversation about the early morning activities that take place before the start of the day.  Many people have questioned the 6:00 a.m. start to our strength and conditioning program, and perhaps on a handful of occasions over the past eight years there has been a complaint about early morning practices and rehearsals after a late night event.  There have probably been more complaints about Early Bird PE than other morning activities, though we have moved it to a little bit later start.  I find that interesting because it is totally an elective class option.  No student is required to take Early Bird PE!  This said, we should have more conversation if we truly want to do what is in the best interest of our students and their learning.  I for one would be in favor of a change to a later start time at the high school, and I’m an early morning guy.  I see a lot of kids come through those doors in the morning that are not ready for a day of learning.  I am very curious as to what parents and students would think, but in my opinion, this is a case where we need to put the students first.  After all, they’re the reason we do what we do.

Who Is In Charge?

I found this article in a recent email and it struck me that maybe it would be a good one at the start of the school year.  In essence it poses the question of who is calling the shots at home: you or your child?  Tim Elmore puts some perspective to this question and proposes how we can do a better job as parents.  There's some good advice here!

Are You in Charge of Your Kids Or Are They in Charge of You?

What Does It Look Like For Jobs In The Future?

When you get down to it, the purpose of high school, and then college, is to prepare a person for a job or a career.  That is the fundamental purpose of school!  Over the past six years we have stressed to parents and students that they need to take a very honest look at career possibilities with an open mind, and yet in some respects this seems to fall on deaf ears as we have seen little difference with our students and their pursuits once they graduate from high school.  There have been a few exceptions, but it seems that students and parents are ignoring a very important sector of our labor force that is screaming to us that they need workers.  That is the skilled labor sector, a part of our economy in Iowa with a great deal of opportunity.  In fact, we have local and regional employers that cannot find enough skilled workers, and because of that, they are paying wages and providing benefits that equal if not exceed some of the white-collar occupations commonly filled by four-year college graduates.  These are good jobs and yet few students from our school are looking in that direction!

It would appear that "skilled labor" has a negative connotation, and perhaps there is a belief that this kind of work is beneath kids that are finishing high school.  The truth is that these jobs are not beneath anyone, and the reality is that there is a need for people to fill these jobs.  And more important, these jobs are indicative of what the future job market is going to be.  The reason for that is because each year there are fewer and fewer jobs that require routine cognitive work (a lot of which requires a four-year diploma) or manual labor.  Unless they are location-dependent, most of these jobs are being outsourced to foreign countries with cheaper labor, or replaced by computers and other machines.  Yet when you look at the post-graduation plans of our students we see an overwhelming number of students opting to attend a four year college and a steady number of graduates entering the workforce out of high school.  Yes, we have a good percentage of students who attend a community college, but when asking them their intention, more often than not it is to get an A.A. degree and then transfer to a four-year institution.  

Both of my kids have opted to go the four-year route, but not without me putting pro’s and con’s, as well as data in front of them.  I am worried about their employability, and would have no concern if they were to change their mind and pursue a different direction, though one has already burnt through a lot of money for three years toward a business degree and a Spanish minor!  Despite their choices I cannot help but believe that over the course of their life there will be some significant re-training or even a change in careers.  I have faith that they have the fundamental skills to make those shifts, and believe they will land on their feet.  But, it would have been easier in some respects had they followed the path for the highly skilled jobs that are in such high demand.

Our Project Lead The Way courses are designed to give a student a start on the kind of skills that highly skilled workers will need.  We have partnered with a number of local businesses and industry, and they have offered many opportunities for our students to take a closer look at these kinds of occupations.  Problem solvers and people that can work with technology are in demand.  Another field wide open is health care.  We have the good fortune to have a hospital, clinic, dentists and optometrists in our community as well as a number of other institutions the need health care professionals. There is a constant need for employees, and it is critical for the future of our community that they can find quality workers.

The video below was shown a few years back at a workshop I attended.  It would be worth your time to take the time to watch it.  I would also advise you to take some time and sit down with your son or daughter and really take a look at resources that are available to see what future prospects look like.  

Humans Need Not Apply

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Pq-S557XQU

How You Can Build Confidence In Your Teen

Regular readers know how much I love the work of Tim Elmore and his Growing Leaders blog is a weekly must read for me.  Confidence is an issue that I have worked to develop in young people long before I became a teacher.  In reality I did it as a peer as that was my leadership style growing up and playing a number of team sports.  It also took place in the neighborhood playing in the vacant lot or someone’s backyard.  I was very confident in my abilities and I worked hard to instill that in my friends and teammates too.  Over the years I cannot count how much work I have done with this, and for the most part it has been successful, though in reflection, my efforts have failed more than I would have liked.  Different personalities require different approaches and sometimes I took the wrong one.  Most recently though I have worked with a few young ladies teaching them to become better softball pitchers, and in my approach I have stressed the importance of the mental approach to pitching as well as the mechanics.  Foremost in these lessons has been confidence. 

In the article below Elmore does an outstanding job summarizing key points in helping young people develop confidence.  I have made a copy of this to refer to as I continue in my work.  One bit of advice that I will give you is to read every word and don’t go halfway with any of them.  Too often we only take bits and pieces and then wonder why something doesn’t work.  These are good things to do with your child and I strongly encourage you to use them!

Ten Ideas to Build Confidence in Teens

Still A Fan, But I've Changed

When I was a kid growing up I don’t think I was any different than any other sports obsessed American boy.  The game I played changed with the season and my aspiration in life in terms of what professional sport I was going to play followed the same path.  Throughout the summer I dreamed of hitting home runs for the Oakland A’s or playing third based for the Phillies after my hero Mike Schmidt retired.  Once the leaves changed I imagined myself pounding through the line of scrimmage just like Larry Czonka did with the Dolphins.  When I caught the wrestling bug the winter months were spent honing my skills on the mat with Olympic rings serving as my goal.  Sprinkled in there was the periodic plan to ride broncs and bulls like Larry Mahan.  As I moved on into high school and would rank my favorites, baseball and wrestling were at the top followed by football from both a participation and spectator perspective.  In addition, I loved to watch about any sport because I am fascinated by competition and human effort, along with strategy and the whole culture of sport.  Nothing beat watching a good college football rivalry game, ABC’s Wide World of Sports, or my favorite, the Olympics every four years.  

As I’ve aged things have changed a lot and I suppose that is due to all the experiences that I have gone through, including no longer being able to participate in sport at a level where it is enjoyable, having kids that compete (though in very different ways), watching significant changes in sports, and perhaps just becoming more thoughtful and reflective.  At this point in my life I am obviously a spectator, and to a very limited extent, a coach.  If I were to rank my Top 5 favorite sports, this is how it would line up: 1) softball, 2) soccer, 3) college baseball, 4) college football, and 5) rugby.  I guess that I would have to put wrestling in there as a tie for 5th as I have switched it with rugby a couple of times over the course of writing this!  The list has certainly changed!

Softball is my passion.  I absolutely love the game, and it is the only one that I am still active in, working with young players and still doing a little coaching.  From an athletic standpoint nothing has given me more joy than to watch my own daughter play the game, yet I love watching anyone play!  Some people think that it is just baseball played with a bigger ball on a smaller field, but it is much more than that.  The game itself is faster than baseball and there is strategy in softball that does not exist on the big diamond.  And, girls have gotten so much more athletic in the last fifteen years that it has become a truly entertaining game to watch.  There is a lot of hustle and energy on the field and it is a game that continues to get better.  I played a little fast pitch in my younger days and one of my few regrets is that I had to move on and get a life and a job!  

My new found passion is soccer, more accurately, professional and international football.  Once August rolls around I am up every Saturday and Sunday morning by 5:30 to watch the English Premier League games live on the NBC networks.  I keep up to date on four different websites with what is happening in the major professional leagues.  I do not miss a Team USA game on television, men or women.  I admit that I am still working on remembering the players and the lineups, though I have a pretty good perspective of the top players and who they play for.  I am also fairly slow at learning a lot of the nuances of the game, but I am coming along.  I need to sit down with a true soccer coach and learn more about the offenses, defenses, and set pieces.  That’s on my list for the fall!  Both of my kids played soccer when they were young and both of them loved it.  I sincerely wish that both of them would have had a chance to play in high school, but that’s how it goes.

Baseball continues to be another passion of mine, though most of my attention is given to the college game.  This past year when the eight teams assembled in Omaha for the College World Series, I picked Coastal Carolina and UC-Santa Barbara, and tossed in Arizona as my third pick.  From my standpoint I could not have asked for a better 19 days!  Coastal won it all in a tremendous three game series against Arizona.  And while this was the fourth year since 1968 that I missed being at the CWS, I watched a lot of games.  One of the truly difficult things for me personally in our move to northeast Iowa was being so far away from Lincoln and Nebraska Cornhusker baseball, and Omaha for the CWS.  I watch a lot of games on television and wish that BTN would broadcast more of them.  One benefit of our move is that I am very close to many of the Northwoods League teams, one of the premier summer programs for college baseball players.  I do follow Major League Baseball during the playoffs, and still cheer on the A’s and Phillies, but I can’t name more than two or three players on each of those teams.  I was very frustrated back in the early 1990’s when baseball shut down and vowed that I wasn’t going to go to any MLB games again.  Well, time heals wounds and I have been to two, Dodger Stadium was too good of an opportunity to pass up, and most recently, I went to a game in Minneapolis to watch the Twins play my Phillies.  The cost of professional games does not make it real attractive to start going to some of these new ballparks, but who knows.  

Nothing matches the pageantry and game day excitement of college football.  I love the game and cheer enthusiastically for the Nebraska Cornhuskers and Iowa State Cyclones.  Few things give me as much enjoyment as spending all day Saturday watching college football.  The game is still creative and traditions still pull me in.  I have a bucket list of stadiums that I want to travel to and watch a game, and will hopefully be able to check a few of them off in the near future.  The frustrating part of college football, and the thing that puts a bad taste in my mouth is the exploitation of the athletes and all of the money — billions! — that is poured into a game that is played by students who attend academic institutions.  That part really turns me off, but up until now I am able to block all of that from my conscience on Saturdays when I am watching the game.  The NFL holds little interest to me.  The schemes on both sides of the ball are cookie cutter and honestly, there is little excitement on the field.  The past two years I watched less than a full game of professional football during the regular season.  I did tune in during the playoffs to see if Peyton Manning could get it done one more time, but other than that, I spend my time doing something else on Sunday afternoons.

Rugby and wrestling are the other sports that are on my passion list.  I have really enjoyed rugby, actually since my college days when a couple of friends of mine played on the club team at Nebraska.  In hindsight I wish I had joined the club and played.  Today, we have a couple of teachers at NFV that are playing the game with a club out of Decorah, and a few students that have expressed an interest.  It is a viable option to football and in my opinion, a game that I would have no problem seeing replace football.  This is a game that I still need to learn more about from a rules perspective, but I really enjoy watching them play.  Talk about incredible athletes.  No sport is more honest than wrestling.  One on one vs. your foe.  It is the true way to challenge oneself.  The sport has really come a long way in terms of technique and the quality of the elite level wrestlers.  On the other hand, I really don’t like what I see at the youth level, and the negative impact I see it having on high school wrestling.  The sport has suffered from the “participation trophy” syndrome, and I think that the rules are outdated and could be changed to make it more exciting and appeal to new fans.  That said, I missed not being able to watch as much wrestling as I would like the past few years because my daughter was playing basketball, and it has been great to get back into the gym and see the fellas square off against one another.

Things have changed over the years and I am certainly spending my leisure time different than how I used to thirty years ago.  I don’t think it is unusual for people’s likes and preferences to change over time, and maybe I will even change more in my choices.  While I wait to see if that happens, I write this with the state softball tournament just ending  and I am counting the days to the start of the soccer season and college football!  If you need me on a Saturday or Sunday morning, I’ll be watching a game!