I am not a Pittsburgh Steelers fan, but as a football fan, I have tremendous respect for the organization. Since I was a young fan during the Terry Bradshaw and Steel Curtain era, the Steelers have played the game at a very high level and have been one of the most respect organizations in professional sports. The Steelers have always been known for a ferocious defense that usually had at least one or two very aggressive hitters. One of those in the not too distant past was James Harrison. Harrison had a very successful professional career and I can visualize a number of punishing hits he dished out on the playing field. Yet it is not something that he did on the field that has drawn my attention to him. It’s not even something he did as a linebacker. This article is all about something he did as a dad. What did he do? When his sons came home with some really cool looking participation trophies, he sent them back!
When Harrison played, he had to earn everything he ever achieved as an N.F.L. linebacker. No one gave him trophies for showing up. He was an underrated free agent out of Kent State University. These guys don’t get big contracts or signing bonuses. They are kind of like walk-ons at college. They have to fight and scrap to get on the field and grab the attention of their coaches in those brutal summer N.F.L. training camps. Harrison did that and eventually became a five-time Pro Bowl player that earned two Super Bowl rings. Nothing was ever given to James Harrison, and he wasn’t going to stand for anything to be given to his sons. If his sons were going to receive a trophy, they were going to earn them like he and his teammates earned those Super Bowl rings.
Don’t get confused that this is about win at all costs. There is nothing to suggest that Harrison had that kind of an attitude when it came to his sons and their participation in youth sports. He may have very well had that attitude for himself as a professional football player, but there is nothing to suggest this was his attitude toward his sons. No, his attitude is one that I wish more parents had when it comes to raising their children: Nothing is given to you. You have to earn it. I have bemoaned what I have seen as a ridiculous practice in one of my favorite sports, wrestling, that I have seen develop over the years, and I believe has had a detrimental effect on the sport. In youth wrestling in Iowa and I would guess other places, most youth tournaments have been turned into fundraisers for high school teams and wrestling clubs. They aren’t about the development of young wrestlers. How do you make more money for your team or club? You attract more wrestlers to your tournament who’s parents are willing to shell out a $10.00 to $15.00 entry fee, pay $5.00 at the gate to get into watch their kid wrestle, and pay for food at the concession stand. It can be quite lucrative for a small town high school program or wrestling club! But how do you get the kids to come to your tournament rather than another one on the same day? You give a bigger trophy to the winner and medals to everyone who comes. Even the young boy that gets pinned three times gets a medal, stands on the podium, and gets his picture taken. In essence, his parents bought him a medal with the entry fee and he has a tangible award for getting pinned three times. What did he earn? It is no different at the end of the soccer season when the coach or the league hands out a trophy to all of the players who were on the team, whether they won the league championship or didn’t win a game. Everyone gets a trophy! This is where James Harrison pushed back and said to the football league his boys played in, “You can keep your trophies. My sons didn’t earn them."
Harrison posted this on Facebook, along with a pictures of the trophies his sons brought home:
“I came home to find out that my boys received two trophies for nothing, participation trophies! While I am very proud of my boys for everything they do and will encourage them 'til the day I die, these trophies will be given back until they EARN a real trophy. I’m not sorry for believing that everything in life should be earned and I’m not about to raise to boys to be men by making them believe that they are entitled to something just because they tried their best…cause sometimes your best is not enough, and that should drive you to want to do better…not cry and whine until somebody gives you something to shut u up and keep you happy. #harrisonfamilyvalues"
I see the same thing in school. We have some students that think that they should get a good grade because they showed up, or handed in a paper, regardless of the quality of work. It has been my mission the past twenty years to raise the bar and demand more because to succeed in life you have to do more than show up. An “A” on a paper or a test should be earned. Grade inflation has ruined public education and all one has to do is talk to veteran teachers who have been in the profession for thirty years. I have asked the question: “Is your “A” that you give today based on the same quality standard of work that it was 30-years ago?” The response is 100% “No!” So I have followed up with “Why?” And that is where it gets difficult. When teachers actually reflect on why this has happened they don’t like what they see. Parental pressure and concern about the self-esteem of their children are the two most common answers. Many educators got tired of the complaining and the challenges from parents, and basically gave in. Many got tired of the fight. Some felt pressure from principals because they were getting pressure from parents and their bosses. And then the concern about building confidence through tangible reward era came about, and before you know what happened, yesterday’s “C” had become today’s “A,” and people like me have asked, “What have they done to earn it?"
No, I was never a fan of James Harrison on the football field. He was a vicious player that I felt stepped over the line. However, I am a fan of James Harrison, the dad that wants his children to earn what they get.
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